A cry steps out my chest and calls into the ocean abyss. The waves batter my limbs against my body and leave me powerless. A current grabs my legs and fights to pull me into its waters. The air in me replaced by liquid and I am breathless. My salty tears drown my lungs and … More depression again…
Weep a lonely song little boy.
Weep long and quietly. … More a poem ‘Weep, little boy’
I am not longer in the same world I was before. Things are calmer now. I am myself. In a way, this self is more boring. I do not find her as interesting. But, she is not as painful and is easier to live with – so I prefer her. She may not be as … More when I was happy last year
I do not know where I will go or how the future will unfold. This depressive blip was shorter than I thought I knew. My imaginations of the future never seen as great as God makes it. Perhaps one day I will dream, but dream big enough. The breath in my lungs was laboured in pain. … More Stay, Okay.
What if it’s happening again? What if… what if I am slowly slipping south again? What if this is not just a blip but a line? Maybe this is depression… again… How many days has it been? It’s Friday. A week and a half then. Maybe two weeks? I think it’s two weeks. I forget … More I’m sorry if I slipped
Honestly, I miss my anxiety and depression. I got used to their presence. They have been by my side many nights since I was thirteen. In the last eight months, they have all but been my life. I drew comfort from my pain and suffering. Now it isn’t here in the same force as it … More running from… what?
I am so weak. A loud bang can set my heart pounding and I begin to spiral into a panic attack. I have to pull myself together and find peace. Peace from what? A loud noise, really? The smallest trigger can launch my chest into a high level of anxiety that can take the whole … More You tell me your grace is sufficient
A pink pill slips down my throat again. Been awhile and I missed its taste. Take me off it and my body rebels. Nausea laces my thoughts and vertigo dances in my eyes. Electric shocks run across my brain as my body withdraws. A wall of depression assaults me. Anxiety screeches through my body halting … More PINK PILL
I don’t know what to do. My body and mind have been suffering. I was having panic attacks. I would hide for fear of being accused of insanity. I did feel afraid and terrified, but also so much more. The anger would rage and I would despair; begging to strip myself of my flesh. … More a savage BEAST
There is a dull ache in my heart. I am an observer of the life that flows around me. My heart beats thud, dunk, thud, dunk. I am not of the beat, but merely a hearer of the beat. What of the beat of the African drum that my heart has danced to? What of … More I think I’m DROWNING