I can not begin to describe how incredible it is to feel ‘normal again’. My mind is clear! I can think straight. Waves of dark fog no longer resides in the caverns of my mind. I stand next to friends saying I am great and mean it. When I go out or lay on my bed I feel no traces of icy fear. I didn’t realise how distorted the lense on my eyes was till it was removed. I can think clearly.
It’s as though I have spent this year weighed down in bulky, wet and cold clothing. My feet were dragged through thick dark mud as a stench reached into my nose and poisoned my mind. I had long forgotten what is was like to be ok, to be great. How I would have cried if I remembered.
Maybe that’s what it is like before one comes to know Christ; before one begins to live the way one was made to. I would not want to live in that distortion. I want to seek after the freedom of Christ. For even in these last months, even when I couldn’t think right, freedom and hope lay peacefully in my heart. Christ was my strength. Christ is my strength. If only you knew. I only you could know. Maybe you do.